The Commentators say it as they see it – all the world as sport.
Once stalwarts of the radio, whose voices brought major sporting events into the nation’s living rooms, now The Commentators have fallen from favour. Now they eke out a living wherever they can find work. They bring to their marathon commentaries of everyday life the same unquenchable enthusiasm they once applied to the greatest sporting contests.
The Commentators are a spin-off from a legendary 24 Hour Scalextric event staged in 2009. Commentaries are usually audible both live and online, they provide an alternative vision of the world we live in. It is professional people watching, it is CCTV for the radio, it is a public service – of sorts.
They have been booked to commentate on festivals, openings, the World Gurning Championship, 12 hours in the life of Broad Street, a primary school sports day and Birmingham Royal Ballet’s Nutcracker.
You can listen back to some commentary highlights here: thecommentators.live
And you can listen back to their lockdown ‘Film On The Radio’ podcasts on your usual podcast platform by searching for Stan’s Internet Cafe or here: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/stans-internet-cafe
The Commentators Call: The General Election
Craig Stephens & James Yarker
Researcher Nick Booth
Tech Dominic Thompson
The Commentators Call: Scalextric Racing
@ Remix Henley
Graeme Rose & Craig Stephens
Marshal: Dominic Thompson
Gloucester Goes Retro
Craig Stephens & James Yarker
Marshal: Dominic Thompson
The Commentators Call: Moseley Folk Festival
Craig Stephens & James Yarker
Commissioned by Moseley Folk Festival 2014. Tech Jon Ward
Craig Stephens & James Yarker
Commissioned by Moseley Folk Festival 2015. Tech Jon Ward
Craig Stephens & James Yarker
Commissioned by Moseley Folk Festival 2017. Tech Jon Ward
Craig Stephens & James Yarker
Commissioned by Moseley Folk Festival. 2018 Tech Peter Maxwell-Dixon & Ryan Knight
Craig Stephens & James Yarker Commissioned by Moseley Folk Festival 2019: Tech Peter Maxwell-Dixon & Ryan Knight
Craig Stephens & James Yarker
Commissioned by Moseley Folk Festival 2021: Tech Peter Maxwell-Dixon, Robin Stephens & Ryan Knight
First red hat of the day here at the Birmingham library”. I can’t seem to turn off this commentary from @stanscafe
Twitter
The Commentators Call: 24 Hour Scalextric
Craig Stephens & James Yarker
Tech Rhubarb Radio and Alan Dolhasz
The Commentators Call: BE Festival Awards
Craig Stephens & James Yarker
M.C. Graeme Rose. Commissioned by BE Festival
The Commentators Call: Birmingham Young Professional of the Year Awards
Commissioned by Birmigham Future. Tech Peter Maxwell-Dixon
The Commentators Call: Kinder Exeter
Craig Stephens & James Yarker
Commissioned by Kinder Exeter
Tech advice Peter Maxwell- Dixon
The Commentators Call: West Bromwich
Lyng Media Club & James Yarker. Commissioned by Creative Black Country
The Commentators Call: Celebrating 10 Years Festival
Gareth Brierley & Jack Trow
The Commentators Call: Egramont Crab & Sports Fair
(Including World Gurning Championships)
Craig Stephens & James Yarker
Commissioned by AND Festival (archive recording here), engineer Simon Hanson
The Commentators Call: Billesley Primary Sports Day
Graeme Rose & Craig Stephens
Supported by James Yarker with Evie Boulstridge
The Commentators Call: Broad St. 18:00 – 06:00
Craig Stephens & James Yarker
Commissioned by Fierce. Tech Peter Maxwell Dixon
The Commentators Call: Birmingham Royal Ballet
Craig Stephens & James Yarker
Featuring David Bintley & The Nutcracker. In association with Birmingham Royal Ballet. Tech Peter Maxwell-Dixon. Video by Alex Earle
The Commentators Call: Lunar Festival
Craig Stephens & James Yarker
Commissioned by Lunar Festival Festival Tech Jon Ward with Georgiana Mihai
The Commentators Call: Jewellery Quarter Festival
2019 Craig Stephens & James Yarker. 2017 Craig Stephens & Jack Trow. Commissioned by Jewellery Quarter Business Improvement District
The Commentators Call: A Crowd Watching Brazil vs Portugal
Craig Stephens & James Yarker
Commissioned by Fierce. Tech Howard Potts
The Commentators Call: Laura & Dan’s Wedding Reception
The Commentators Call: The Grand Northern Ukulele Festival, Huddersfield
Jake Oldershaw & Jack Trow Tech: Dominic Thompson
Tour dates
-
24 August 2024
Scalextric Racing
@ Gloucester Goes Retro,
Gloucester -
4 July 2024
The General Election Count
Hall 3 ICC, Birmingham -
30 May – 1 June 2024
Scalextric Racing
Re-Mix
Hanley, Stoke-On-Trent -
21 September 2023
First Folio Celebrations,
Birmingham -
29 July 2023
Worcester Fringe Festival -
16 June 2023
Grand Northern Ukulele Festival,
Huddersfield -
22 April 2023
Laura & Dan’s Wedding -
3 & 4 September, 2022
Moseley Folk Festival -
31 July – 2 August, 2022
Celebrating 10 Years Festival,
Queen Elizabeth Olympic Park -
19 & 25 June, 2022
Birmingham International Dance Festival -
3 – 5 September, 2021
Moseley Folk Festival -
28th & 29th August, 2021
Weekender, Birmingham -
19th June, 2021
Kinder Exeter Festival -
31st August – 1st September, 2019
Moseley Folk Festival -
29th June, 2019
Jewellery Quarter Festival, Birmingham -
16th May, 2019
Birmingham Young Professional of the Year Awards -
29th November, 2018
Birmingham Royal Ballet -
31st August – 2nd September, 2018
Moseley Folk Festival -
23rd September, 2017
Bull Ring Open Market -
1st – 3rd September, 2017
Moseley Folk Festival -
29th July, 2017
Jewellery Quarter Festival, Birmingham -
5th – 6th September, 2015
Moseley Folk Festival -
5th – 7th June, 2015
Lunar Festival -
16th January, 2015
Under the Radar, New York City -
30th & 31st August, 2014
Moseley Folk Festival -
13th July, 2014
BE Festival, Birmingham -
2nd – 5th September, 2013
Library of Birmingham -
11th July, 2013
Billesley Primary School, Birmingham -
17th September, 2011
AND Festival, Egremont, Cumbria -
24th March, 2011
Broad Street, Birmingham -
25th June, 2010
Students Guild/Warwick Arts Centre -
9th November 2009
Eastside Projects, Birmingham -
13/14th June, 2009
@ A E Harris, Birmingham
The Commentators Call: The Library Of Birmingham Opening
Craig Stephens & James Yarker
Technical and other genius Jon Ward. Thanks to Canstream
You can take 10 books out at a time, so I’d say go for it, take a chance”. @stanscafe live commentary on Birmingham library. Compulsive.
Twitter
The Commentators Call: Eastside Projects Opening
(Abstract Cabinet Show)
Graeme Rose & Craig Stephens
Commissioned by Gavin Wade
The Commentators Call: Birmingham Weekender
Graeme Rose, Jack Trow & James Yarker. Commissioned by Weekender
The Commentators Call: The Public Theater, New York City
Craig Stephens & Graeme Rose
Commissioned by Under The Radar
The Commentators Call: Birmingham International Dance Festival
Graeme Rose & James Yarker
Graeme Rose & Craig Stephens
The Commentators Call: Bull Ring Open Markets
Craig Stephens & Graeme Rose
Commissioned by Birmingham Weekender. Tech Peter Maxwell-Dixon
The Commentators Call: Shakespeare’s First Folio
Craig Stephens & James Yarker Commissioned by Everything To Everybody – Shakespeare’s First Folio visits Bullring Birmingham
The Commentators: Film On The Radio
Dirty Dancing, Psycho, Back To The Future, Star Wars, Die Hard, Withnail and I
Audio description from The Commentators. A ‘lockdown project’ that has never quite gone away.
I was in the library on several different occasions over the first three days and found the Commentators incredibly irritating and tedious. They clearly thought that they were being very clever but their banal comments just droned on. I felt really sorry for the people who had to work near them – at least I could escape to upper floors.
Anon
